Peace in my Day

I'm always addressing peace in the abstract. Some days it is more a matter of bringing peace to my own tiny sphere. That's not always easy, because my health has been atrocious and even my aches have aches. Nevertheless it can be done.

Today I began with a quiet meditation, emptying my mind and just be-ing. That seemed to be a good start. There were chores to be done, but I did not tackle them right away. Instead I journeyed through my various online communities,wrote emails, all in a rather leisurely manner.

One thing that has worried me a lot is my weight. I've begun many diets, most lasting only a few days. Besides the weight, my feet are swelling up, and lately I have been plagued with persistent chapped lips. So after my morning wakeup tab, I replaced my drink of choice with old fashioned water. My suspicion is that the water may help both the lips and the swelling, because colas have tons of sodium in them. I also decided to begin eating small portions of healthy food. If I am doing something, anything, then there is a peace that comes with that.

I took Lucy for a walk today. Mostly I've just been taking her out back, throwing the ball for exercise. Goodness I put on that leash and she was so excited. We could not get out the door fast enough. The rain today did not materialize, so aside from a persistent breeze, the weather was quite lovely. The walk was nice, but unfortunately not pain free. Sciatic pains plagued the entire journey up my left leg. Undaunted, we walked and it was worth it all just watching a very thrilled dog go through her paces.

A degree of peace has come by just cutting back how much I have the talking heads of the news turned on in the house. I tried that for a few minutes, then switched to some light classical music. Television no longer is a good source of news anyway. Though she does not run from her liberal bias, some of the best and fairest commentary today is coming from Rachel Maddow. Her stories are well researched and she presents them in a fair way. She does not simply accept the word of the spin doctors, but actually challenges them, always with facts on her side.

So sitting here listening to Mozart, sipping on my glass of water, I feel real contentment. I must have done something right. I have found peace in this day. Perhaps I will try to repeat the experience tomorrow, and maybe even walk a but further.

L'chaim.

A Time to Start Over, A Time to Grieve

It comes in everyone's life periodically I think. A time when full realization gives way to a reassessment over how one lives day to day. As long as I can remember, I've been involved in various causes for what I saw as improvement in the way things are done. Think gay rights, environmentalism, social justice issues. In some areas we made outstanding gains, and it was good to play a part in that process.

One thing however has become increasingly apparent. In the United States of Corporate America, the individual no longer matters. We now have the best Congress the corporations, now referred to as Dear Leader.corp can buy. It was with little effort and disarming ease that the corporate millions succeeded in destroying the first attempt to tackle health care reform in decades, replacing a public option with a co-op that in a relatively short time will just be one more insurance corporation, putting the screws to ordinary Americans, well like me. 72% before wanted this health reform. Now in a manner reminiscent of 1984, Americans are being re-educated to follow the corporate line. Dear Leader.corp succeeded in getting our president to acceding the corporate pillaging of our pharmaceutical costs and now has surrendered the one hope to control their greed through the public competitor.

In light of all this, it is time for me to reevaluate my own choices. I'm leaning towards the notion of bringing it all back home. Focus on my garden and my writing and making sure in every way possible I can be freed of corporate strings. My father died at age 48, my mother at age 70. I am 62 years old with a finite amount of time left on this earth before I become just one more blip among billions who lived and then died. It is time to seek my happiness, my passions, and my joy. Reflect on the beauties of the natural world in which I live, enjoy my annual garden, take walks with intention, spend time with my beloved partner and our animals. It is time to seek laughter wherever it can be found. It is time to experience the esthetically beautiful, and have long extended conversations with anyone who cares to listen and appreciate. Most important, it is time to stop fighting windmills. That must now belong to the generation that follows.

It will not be easy to separate of course. Politics has been part and parcel of my life for longer than I care to remember. There will be a period of grief. But the fact is this. We are now under corporate rule, with a Congress who serves their needs. On a national scale we have lost. Now only our own personal spheres have some hope of redemption. With but a few years left, I'm committed to working on my little space in the world. In my world there is room for morality. In the greater world, amorality is the calling card. Enjoy it you selfish blood sucking vultures, and though I do not believe in hell, I pray there was one where your carcasses could rot. For the rest, for my friends, seek peace and love. Can't beat that combo with a stick.

Today, Peace, and a Prayer

Today. That is what I have. Today. I've got this ongoing never ending hacking cough that is my curse for this lifetime. Chronic bronchitis exacerbated by asthma and it makes me weary. Still I'm blest. I've got a mind and the capacity to sit up and share and live on, chronic or not.

Today. That is what I have. Today. Out to the back Lucy and I went. She sniffed around a bit, did her business, and then found a good spot in the sun to recline. I harvested a few more zucchini, then gave the plants a bit of water before coming back up. Tonight we eat the rest of a tasty pasta dish I made with homemade zucchini sauce, meat, and my own blend of seasonings. It's good enough to eat twice without qualms.

Today. That is what I have. Today. I feel alarmed. Our nation is reaching new levels of division and hatred. Melissa Harris Lacewell shares some racist mail she received. Town halls turning into shouting sessions rather than reasoned discourse. It also makes me sad. How can we harbor such racism and anger? It's beyond me. Do we find ways to confront the disruptors so that reasoned discourse can take place? Germany did not and the result was, well you get my drift.

Today. That is what I have. Today. What part do I play in division? How can I better strive for open ended listening and a willingness to hear that other viewpoint, especially when different from my own. I don't have to agree. But there does seem to be an obligation to listen as well as to give.

Today is a day to strive for peace. As much as I wish I could, those other things fall outside my control. Oh I can confront racism and bigotry, I participate in the larger society, but for that person who is led to simply disrupt, to hate. I have no power over their decision.

There is a Christian hymn I dearly love. Or at least one line of it.

"Let there be peace on earth, and let it begin with me."

Perhaps becoming the peace I desire is the most evangelical action I can take. It's never easy to do when all the external pressures are there. The concern, the health issues, the voices of no screaming in my ears from all directions. But our world does not exist in a vacuum. Buddha did not teach in a tranquil world, Jesus lived in truly tumultuous times. So it must be in the search for peace.

Today. That is what I have. Today.

A friend who works in a prison ministry came across this poem. It is a version of the Dayenu, a Passover piece. I don't have an attribution for it, but it reflects my mood today:

IT WOULD BE ENOUGH
If morning will come and discover us
If the heart will fill up again, it is enough for us
If, in the warm sun, wheat fields will ripen
If we break our hunger and thirst
It is enough for us

And if a bit of compassion still remains
And we have a reason to be happy
It is enough for us
It is enough for us enough, enough
It is enough for us enough, enough
If we say a good word, that will overwrite the hatred
If we will know a bit of peace of mind
It is enough for us
If we still find love, if we will vow again
If we feel that hope is not lost
It is enough for us
And if a bit of compassion still remains
And we have a reason to be happy
And if the next generation will be happy
It is enough for us
And we will not ask for more
If we stand up and not be afraid
To extend our hand again
If we fulfil only one dream
It is enough for us
If we will solve the only riddle
If we see it is not a fairy tale
It is enough for us